Raising Daughters

So it's only my second full day here at Crossroads camp, where I am nannying for Christy Vena's 3 girls and I have seen first hand how much it takes to be a mom!! Especially a mom of 3!! Wow, I'm exhausted and I don't even take of them all the time. But I wouldn't trade this time for the world - they are the best kids, they really are!! Chris and Christy have done such a good job parenting. They are a joy to take care of. It makes me excited to be a mom but only if I can do it the way she does it or how I'm sure my mom did it. Cuz I've ALSO seen the other kids that are here, whose parents are just as wonderful but who raise their kids differently. And it's NOT so much of a joy to be around them a lot of the time. Makes me think twice about having kids. I don't know if I could do it well!!
And as much as Cadie, Jordan, and Maggie love me (and I love them!) NOTHING can replace their mom. Even when the four of us have had fun and they barely realized that their mom was not there with them, I see their need for the mother's love, which I cannot give no matter how hard I try. I don't think it matters how their parents treat them, kids will always ask for their parents when they are tired or scared or hurt. It's a built-in mechanism and they have an automatic, innate trust in their parent(s), at least to some degree, even if the parents do not do good by them. Which makes me want to SHOOT parents who do nothing to earn their children's naive trust. For a child to be betrayed by a parent or treated badly by a parent must be one of the most despicable things in the world. Hallelujah for a Father who will never betray His child. For a Daddy who always catches His sons. For a Papa who successfully protects His daughters.